Stephen Puibello's
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Why Is There Stigma Associated With HIV & AIDS
In many societies people living with HIV and AIDS are often seen as shameful. In some societies the infection is associated with minority groups or behaviours, for example, homosexuality, In some cases HIV/AIDS may be linked to 'perversion' and those infected will be punished. Also, in some societies HIV/AIDS is seen as the result of personal irresponsibility. Sometimes, HIV and AIDS are believed to bring shame upon the family or community. And whilst negative responses to HIV/AIDS unfortunately widely exist, they often feed upon and reinforce dominant ideas of good and bad with respect to sex and illness, and proper and improper behaviours.

Factors which contribute to HIV/AIDS-related stigma:

Depression & BiPolar Support Alliance
DBSA Is Improving Lives Each year, DBSA reaches over four million people! In addition, billions of people each year hear our messages through the media that depression and bipolar disorder are real, treatable illnesses; that there is help and hope; and that no one with these illnesses needs to feel alone.

Positive Pedalers
We are the POSITIVE PEDALERS and we are the positive face of HIV.

We are a group of people, living with HIV/AIDS, committed to building a supportive and inclusive community for others and ourselves through participation in bicycle-related activities.

We are dedicated to expanding and enhancing public awareness of HIV and AIDS and empowering HIV-positive people to live more meaningful and dignified lives.

Stephen's Blog

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

7:36 PM

THANK YOU TO ALL MY DONORS

Thank you for your messages of support. Thank you for your donations, both helped me raise the most money I've ever raised in the six years I've been riding.  More important everyone, all 108 of you helped me raise awareness about STIGMA via your donations and I'm deeply appreciative you all for making this happen. 

Have a good Summer, Happy Pride.

Hugs & Kisses,

Stephen

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Sunday, June 8, 2008

6:46 AM

Keeping Busy to mask the lonliness!!!!!!!!!

I arrived in San Francisco my second year's ride, same as last year doing endurance training at my gym and last year I rode more miles then last, the difference my mood swings, my depression in what is known as Bi Polar Disorder.  My friends at home have helped me not use my mental illness as a crutch, but the first four days of cycling were extremely hard not so much the phyiscal although when you are depressed you often are drained of so much.  LIFE IN CAMP was hard, pretty much a minority traveling from New Jersesy, cycling alone and then just plain unhappy when everyone else was for the most part happy, I felt paranoid that folks saw me unhappy and for the most part just do what I do best, KEEP BUSY to mask the lonliness, I would arrive in camp and pitch tents, bus peoples dinners, carry gear for cyclist arriving in after me.  I want to thank the STAFF at the SFAF whom I had the opportunity to work with at Cow Palace as I volunteered all day Friday, and two days at the HQ on Market Street, they all when seeing me on the road, at the rest stops and in camp daily, greeted me with hello's and hugs, and also checked in with me as they  and this got me through this years ride.  I also want to thank the LA Center Director of Mental Health Services whom I was introduced to my another Staff member and friend who helped me out all week, Dave Ellison...the vent session helped me a great deal to move on. I also want to thank the many cyclist and roadies who did read my BLOG, the NEWS articles and gave me hugs and thanks for all my work on raising awareness!  As a Gay man I pretty much live in a minority, add to that HIV and Mental Illness and imagine how alone it can get, this is why I had such a hard ride. I also want to thank Jonathan for sharing dinner one night and for sharing the candle light vigil (sorry I missed you at closing).

I did meet some wonderful people, the folks in row F around my tent F35, each year I meet a few more and each year my ALC family grows, but getting close to all of them is hard, I have gotten close to a handful and if I lived in San Francisco I know I would have some great new friends, maybe some year when all the pieces to my complex recovery come together (get my shit together) I would be able to return to work and afford it.  Thanks to my two friends who greeted me at closing ceremonies, thanks to my friends at home who texted me and called me, and others who passed along well wishes via (send a participant a message of support).

I'm registered to RIDE next year, I have a whole year to continue to work on myself both mentally and phyiscally, thank you AIDS LIFE CYCLE, see you next year. 

Today I'm sharing LA PRIDE with my friends from back East who are here, I look forward to seeing my father and my new dog that I just adopted May 2nd, PEPPY when I fly home on Monday.

Cheers everyone

 

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Sunday, June 1, 2008

1:28 AM

20 Year Reunion with EX-BF and Partner

Last year after returning home to New Jersey from ALC 6, I received an email via my website www.BiPolarBear.us from an Ex-BF telling me how proud he is of the work I'm doing as a Rider raising not just money but also  for the awareness I raise on living with STIGMA associated with both HIV and Bi Polar Manic Depression (Mental Illness).  Fellow riders and roadies please if you see me this week and I appear to be sad please know that I'm not sad just that my mind is caught up in so much thought that it gives this appearance, please don't avoid me, but engage with me--I love people.  I'm very proud of myself and the work I do, to date I've made it into the PRESS four times, twicw this year, all articles can be read here on my homepage.  Each day through EDUCATION I'm hoping to bring down the walls that society places around people who are different.

This is my second AIDS Life Cycle ride, in addition I have rode four additional rides back East From Gettysburg, PA to Manhattan...cycling in general is hard for me, not the endurance some days the mania plus the andrenline I'm one fired up machine, but on others I can have sensory overload, these days I'm completely overwhelmed, I'm hoping to have a successful ALC 7 ride this year, I've been doing endurance training at my gym, I've been treating my Bi Polar holistically with meditation, supplements and excercise, I've dropped 57 lbs to do this years ride.

Let us all RIDE ON, HYDRATE, HYDRATE, HYDRATE, HAVE FUN and BE SAFE!

Stephen

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Thursday, May 29, 2008

5:20 PM

Puibello Keeps on Cycling by Katie Grasso

Katie Grasso

Cliffside Park Citizen

May 18, 2008

 

Puibello Keeps on Cycling

 

When someone pictures a person who was diagnosed with Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV) over 11 years ago, they might picture a weak or sick individual.  When someone pictures a person who has Bipolar Manic Depression, they may picture an anti-social person hiding within the confines of their home.  Stephen Puibello, however, is the exact antithesis of these stereotypes and, by his own example, is successfully shaking these stigmas.

 

For the second year in a row, Puibello will embark on a 545-mile Californian bicycle ride from June 1 to June 7, spanning San Francisco to Los Angeles to raise awareness of the ongoing need for services and education for the treatment of HIV/AIDS. All cyclists of the AIDS/LifeCycle must raise a minimum of $2,500.00, but Puibello has set his goals high – aiming for $6,500.00  To date, he has already raised $6,450.00 for the cause. 

 

But he also rides for another reason – his diagnosed Bipolar Manic Depression. Though he does not financially raise money at this AIDS/LifeCycle event for his mental disorder, Puibello capitalized on his activism experience by creating a webpage called www.bipolarbear.us.  The logo that he has created combines every aspect of who Puibello is.  It is a picture of a polar bear (represents a larger and muscular person in the gay community) holding a red bicycle over his head (the same color as Puibello’s), wearing an AIDS ribbon.  Through his Web site and the logo he wears on his cycling jersey, Puibello hopes to bring an end to the negative stigma of both AIDS/HIV and Bipolar disorder. 

 

Born and raised in Cliffside Park, Puibello has based his life upon the act of giving.  Starting at age 15, Puibello began volunteering with various organizations and understanding the significance and invaluable life lessons that accompany it.  After graduating from Memorial High School in West New York, New Jersey and Unity College of Maine, he moved up to Boston, Massachusetts in 1986. 

 

A natural-born advocate, Puibello began his career as an activist for both the environment and for his neighbors.  He founded backbaynag.org, a Web site that served to be a community think tank to lobby Boston City Hall.  He made significant strides and got the attention of local politicians, using his wit, personality, and communication skills to fight for what he thought of as fair.  This type of activism, however, requires a lot of energy, and after Puibello’s diagnosis, the fighting became more difficult as his energy levels decreased.

 

In 2001, he returned home to Cliffside Park, where he lives with his father, August.  While living back at home, Puibello attended a Manhattan AIDS charity bicycle ride and met members of POS PED (Positive Pedalers) who were the inspiration for him undertaking larger fundraising goals and events.  After joining their organization, Puibello participated in his first AIDS/LifeCycle ride in 2007 and has done so ever since.   

 

“The ride out there is incredibly beautiful.  You meet so many people while you’re there – all fighting for the same cause.  There are over 3,000 cyclists in the event and it’s beautiful to see all of these people move as one unit down the coast of California,” he says.  The cycling itself has helped Puibello maintain his focus in an otherwise scattered mind and has served as a beneficial outlet for his high level of mental energy.  It has paid off physically, as he has lost 57 pounds in two years. 

 

Surprisingly, although the HIV virus would seem to be the larger concerns of Puibello’s ailments, he says that the stigma of being Bipolar has actually been worse for people to understand, especially regarding relationships.  “When I tell people about it, it’s usually very hard for people to relate to or understand and has unfortunately been the case regarding my relationships.  Hearing about the Bipolar disorder usually sends people running the other way,” Puibello explains.  This is why he works tirelessly to educate people about Bipolar disorder and the effects of it.  More awareness could mean more understanding. 

 

Some people who do understand, however, are his family and friends.  “I’m very close with my father,” he says.  “We’re best friends!”  Puibello’s cousin paid for his airline ticket to the AIDS/LifeCycle event in California, while another paid for his $85 registration fee.  It seems as though his years of volunteering and advocacy have helped make a difference in his fundraising for this event.  The familiar folks that he attends Bingo with have also contributed to his goal, filling Puibello with gratitude toward his community and family.  He hopes that people will continue their generosity and interest in his story and others’ like his.

 

In the meantime, Puibello will spend some time with his new family member, Peppy, a 10 year old rescued Shih Tzu dog and will continue to volunteer at NYC Open Center, a holistic learning center, where he is able to attend classes for free based upon volunteer time.  His goal is to become a Peer Specialist (a person recovering from a mental illness who is trained to help others) with the DBSA (Depression Bipolar Support Alliance).  He hopes to apply for a grant to provide the funding to do so eventually.  He has already received numerous comments and feedback posts on his Web site to thank him for the awareness he is giving those suffering from mental disorders and strives to continue to do so. 

 

At 49 years young, Puibello says that he is in the best shape of his life right now and has no plans of stopping.  “I’ll be 100 years old and still ticking because I truly believe that I’m here for a reason!” he says.

 

For more information on how to donate, please visit: www.bipolarbear.us or you can make a donation by sending your tax-deductible donation to:  AIDS Lifecycle, c/o San Francisco AIDS Foundation, file # 7421502, PO Box 60000, San Francisco, CA 94160  and add rider # 1814 to the payment.

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12:36 PM

THANK YOU POS PED'S FOR PLACING ME ON YOUR PAGE

WHAT AN HONOR IT IS TO BE PLACED ON THE HIV + PARTICIPANTS PORTION OF THE AIDS LIFE CYCLE HOMEPAGE.  I'M VERY FORTUNATE IN THAT ONE OF MY DONORS HELPED ME GAIN NATIONAL EXPOSURE VIA HIV PLUS MAGAZINE MAY/JUNE 2008 EDITION, THE ARTICLE CAN BE READ IN FULL, PLEASE IF YOU HAVEN'T READ PLEASE DO. 

I ARRIVED HERE AND MY LAST BLOG ENTRY THANKED THE MANY CYCLIST I MET DURING LAST YEARS RIDE AND THIS YEAR VIA THE FORUM, THEY ALL UNDERSTAND MY STRUGGLE AND SOME LIVE WITH BIPOLAR THEMSELVES AND WE HAD THE OPPORTUNITY TO MEET UP.  AS I SAID TO HIM, THE AIDS LIFE CYCLE FAMILY CONTINUES TO GROW AND TAKE CARE OF ONE ANOTHER AS ONE OF HIS STORIES TO ME WAS HOW A CYCLIST MAILED HIM ALL SORTS OF SHORTS AND GEAR.  LAST YEAR WAS MY FIRST RIDE AND LAST YEAR I TO RECEIVED BOTH CYCLING ITEMS AND FINANCIAL ASSITANCE IN GETTING ME HERE, THIS YEAR I WAS ABLE TO DO THIS WITH THE HELP OF MY FAMILY.

LOOK FOR ME ON THE ROUTE, I'LL BE WEARING MY WWW.BIPOLARBEAR.US CYCLING JERSEY ON AND OFF DURING THE WEEK...TO READ MORE ABOUT ME VISIT MY HOMEPAGE AS I HAVE ADDED A SECTION CALLED PUIBELLO IN THE NEWS.

RIDE ON, HYDRATE, HYDRATE, HYDRATE AND RIDE SAFE!

STEPHEN PUIBELLO

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Thursday, May 22, 2008

10:01 PM

Thank you to all my San Francisco Buddies

My flight was long but the train ride on Bart to the San Francisco AIDS Foundation went without a hitch.  I want to Thank Dave Ellison for your hospitality and felixibility during my stay, then there's Virgil for arranging the coolest housing in the Castro area of town, and Virgils friend Ron for opening his home to me.  Then there's Jonathan for getting me a two week membership at his gym and also for offering two nights lodging next week.  Jonathan is a first time rider who has been training very hard, we share similar issues thus our meeting months ago, Jonathan you I have enjoyed our breakfasts, our workouts and walks around town.

My first night here Virgil took me to Bear Movie night where about sixty of us watched Prince Caspian, we met at a local food court each dining on various ethnic foods (yummy) thank you Virgil for dinner, movies and transportation to and from on your motorcycle.

Today was my first day volunteering at SFAF with the staff I've talked with on the phone and via email, what a lovely group of dedicated folks, especially my cycle buddy Kari.  Well it was a long day, have some walnut-applesauce low fat brownies in the oven that need my attention.

night everyone

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Tuesday, May 20, 2008

4:42 AM

11 Days from Day ZERO

Day Zero, also called registration eve is the first time all AIDS Life Cycle participants, ALC7 come together.  This is the largest group ever and will be an awesome next seven days, 545 miles together.  I'm looking forward to hooking up with people from last year's ride and to meet folks whom I've been chatting with on the forumn.

I fly out tomorrow and am very excited as I'm participating in an eight day Internship at the San Francisco AIDS Foundation/SFAF for eight days prior to the big event.  I'd like to thank both Virgil and Dave two friends from last year who have provided me with housing while I'm in San Francisco Bay Area, thank you guys so much as I wouldn't have been able to stay the full ten days I'm coming out before the ride on June 1-7, 2008

I'd like to thank Jason my web designer for all his help this year the latest, the addition of Puibello in news found on www.AIDSlifecycle.org/1814 <--check it out for all stories to date.  Then there are my friends and family members who donated, reached out to their friends (helped me raise money) and paid for additional trip expenses, that would be John, Dru, my two Cousins and my Dad....BIG shout out to them.

Then there's a new friend Jonathan whom I haven't met yet, thank you as he has gotten me a two week pass at his gym, that being www.valenciastmuscle.com and also shared many phone calls about his fundraising, his training and ourselves, see you when I arrive tomorrow 5/21 :).

I've reached my GOAL yesterday am at $6,045...THANK YOU EVERYONE from all over the WORLD.... to date 96 people have donated supporting my efforts in raising money for HIV/AIDS and awareness for Bi Polar/Mental Illness and STIGMAS from living with both of them.

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Wednesday, May 7, 2008

7:59 AM

New Addition to the Family

Hi everyone, welcome Peppy a 10 year old animal rescue Shitsu who came into my life via my friend Darren Lee who knew I was considering another dog after the loss of my last rescue dog Kate a Scottish Terrier, I was rescued by a rescue dog, that being Kate as she was a gift from another dear friend David who gave me his dog back in 1996 when I diagnosed. 

Peppy and I first met on the River Walk near our home, I made arrangements to meet Kandy who met me one sunny morning two weeks ago.  Kandy is a Foster Dog Sitter (thank you Kandy for Volunteering your time.  Kandy suggested that her, Robyn from Pet ResQ Inc. in Tenafly, NJ and Peppy come over to meet my Dad.  Dad, Peppy and I spent three hours that night and we made arrangements to then have Peppy for 5 night, well it's going on 7 nights and we sign the adoption papers today :)

I can't figure out how to upload Peppy's Picture here so when I'm out cycling June 1-7 I'm going to place his photo there to share it with everyone, so please come back and take a LQQK and say hello to Peppy.

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Wednesday, April 9, 2008

8:36 AM

20 Days, 37 Days and 51 Days

I'm happy and proud to share that www.hivplusmag.com has taken my message on S T I G M A nationwide this May 1st, thank you Bob Adams, and others for making this happen.

I'm also happy and greatful to several friends in San Francisco for offering me housing so that I could participate in an Intern/Volunteer two weeks prior to the BIG event, that being this awesome life experience--AIDS Life Cycle.

Lastly, I've met so many people last year and this year via my own website www.Bipolarbear.us and off the ALC forum, thank you all for the messages of encouragement, emails and phone calls.

Thanks to my friend John-Patrick for not only making a donation but for extending my fundraising efforts to his own friends, every donation has helped me a great deal, especially this year with the econonmy being the way it is.

Cheers

 

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Sunday, March 23, 2008

3:59 AM

70 Days to DAY ZERO---determined

In Feburary it was the FLU that knocked me out of commission, this past week I stepped off a curb while walking and sprained my lower back with a mucsle spasm, all in all there's been close to a month with NO TRAINING and my body feels it.

TODAY is the second day of Spring and I'm GYM bound, using stationary bike, seated bike as my back is feeling much better, put it this way no need for MUSCLE relaxors in two days, so I'm determined to get back on any bike, outdoors or indoors this month.

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Saturday, March 8, 2008

6:30 PM

92 DAYS to DAY 1 :)

After being sick with the flu and out of the gym close to 16 days and then on and off do to school and volunteer work I'm back to the gym three days in a row.  Did hour of elipitical last night, felt good to open up my lungs.  Today I did half hour of elipitical and half hour on spin bike.  The next 92 days will be jammed packed with endurance training.  Day light savings tomorrow and with that comes longer days and hopefully warmer weather for some saddle time.

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Saturday, March 1, 2008

10:27 AM

Thursday Afternoon Bingo

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Friday, February 29, 2008

8:31 AM

Follow your own path

"Life is complex. Each one of us must make his own path through life. There are no self-help manuals, no formulas, no easy answers. The right road for one is the wrong road for another ... The journey of life is not paved in blacktop; it is not brightly lit, and it has no road signs. It is a rocky path through the wilderness."

-- M. Scott Peck

Read this today and wow, I used not want to live a long life, but then decided to start cycling not only as a POS PED but also as the "Bi Polar Bear," my mission raising awareness on HIV, BiPolar Manic Depression and have made it into the news here and there.  Each time someone reads about my struggle others reach out, email me, we speak, sometimes we meet up and this is what keeps me going. I want to live a long life as long as it is GODS WORK, and in that I mean as long as I can continue to help people along my journey.

11:38 AM EST

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Thursday, February 28, 2008

9:08 PM

NYC Open Center :)

I used to refer to the LGBT Center as my second home, although I visit there often for all kinds of activities, I have found a new second home in that I find myself there not only to Volunteer, but back in school learning new things and in that process meeting new people.  I can remember my first night "Winter Solstice" it was like walking into Santa's workshop, someone cutting out stars, people at their desks working, people buzzing in and out and then people singing and me, wow I didn't think I fit, that was only two months ago and I fit just fine.

EC is were I work as a Volunteer, stands for Events Coordination and what a lovely group of young people, I don't feel old, but am older then most of them, but these people each of them with a gift of their own has taught me a lot about acceptance, tolerence, flexibility....you see the Open Center is a Holistic Education Center and I know SQUAT about this stuff, I merely went there to Volunteer, the program is awesome in that Volunteer time equates into credits for free classes, Thank You Open Center and Angela the Volunteer Manager for this opportunity.

I'm openly Gay, openly HIV, openly BiPolar....heck my life is an open book.  Please don't get read that as I say hello I'm Steve and I'm...A,B,C,D,E and F.  I used to do that, but I've calmed down and leave it at hello I'm Stephen, but when I feel relaxed and at home, and relaxed with people it comes out.

People are curious about one another, I don't take offense when people ask questions, the biggie so what do you do.  I'm to young to be retired, look the part but that's lying and I don't like to lie so I'd say I'm a TRUST Brat, well this is partially true in that I live on a FIXED INCOME and do have a TRUST, but it gets funded when my Dad passes on and I hope that's not for awhile yet and he's 83.

Anyway it's getting late, have a SPIN class to attend tomorrow, then some of my own cardio and weight training.  night everyone.

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Saturday, February 16, 2008

8:55 PM

Out With the Flu......Back on Track with Training

We haven't had a bad Winter here, but we have had some really cold weather, then some warm, then some cold, it's the perfect mix for a visit with the flu bug.  Now being HIV + I got my shot, but I got sick none the same, maybe not as bad as others but six days in and out of bed was enough for me.  Oddly enough I stayed the same in body weight, but I so miss my daily aerobic excercises.

Fundraising is off to a slow start, but thank you to all you earlybirds for sending in your donations. 

Turned 49 today - February 16, 2008...yes I'm an Aquarius.

San Francisco here I come, some four months away.

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Thursday, January 31, 2008

8:55 PM

People with Mental Illness Enrich Our Lives

Abraham Lincoln
The revered sixteenth President of the United States suffered from severe and incapacitating depressions that occasionally led to thoughts of suicide, as documented in numerous biographies by Carl Sandburg.

Virginia Woolf
The British novelist who wrote To the Lighthouse and Orlando experienced the mood swings of bipolar disorder characterized by feverish periods of writing and weeks immersed in gloom. Her story is discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr.

Lionel Aldridge
A defensive end for Vince Lombardi's legendary Green Bay Packers of the 1960's, Aldridge played in two Super Bowls. In the 1970's, he suffered from schizophrenia and was homeless for two and a half years. Until his death in 1998, he gave inspirational talks on his battle against paranoid schizophrenia. His story is the story of numerous newspaper articles.

Eugene O'Neill
The famous playwright, author of Long Day's Journey Into Night and Ah, Wilderness!, suffered from clinical depression, as documented in Eugene O'Neill by Olivia E. Coolidge.

Ludwig van Beethoven
The brilliant composer experienced bipolar disorder, as documented in The Key to Genius: Manic Depression and the Creative Life by D. Jablow Hershman and Julian Lieb.

Gaetano Donizetti
The famous opera singer suffered from bipolar disorder, as documented in Donizetti and the World Opera in Italy, Paris and Vienna in the First Half of the Nineteenth Century by Herbert Weinstock.

Robert Schumann
The "inspired poet of human suffering" experienced bipolar disorder, as discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr.

Leo Tolstoy
Author of War and Peace, Tolstoy revealed the extent of his own mental illness in the memoir Confession. His experiences is also discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr and The Inner World of Mental Illness: A Series of First Person Accounts of What It Was Like by Bert Kaplan.

Vaslov Nijinsky
The dancer's battle with schizophrenia is documented in his autobiography, The Diary of Vaslov Nijinksy.

John Keats
The renowned poet's mental illness is documented in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr and The Broken Brain: The biological Revolution in Psychiatry by Nancy Andreasen, M.D.

Tennessee Williams
The playwright gave a personal account of his struggle with clinical depression in his own Memoirs. His experience is also documented in Five O'Clock Angel: Letters of Tennessee Williams to Maria St. Just, 1948-1982; The Kindness of Strangers: The Life of Tennessee Williams by Donald Spoto, and Tennessee: Cry of the Heart by Dotson.

Vincent Van Gogh
The celebrated artist's bipolar disorder is discussed in The Key to Genius: Manic Depression and the Creative Life by D. Jablow Hershman and Julian Lieb and Dear Theo, The Autobiography of Van Gogh.

Isaac Newton
The scientist's mental illness is discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr and The Key to Genius: Manic Depression and the Creative Life by D. Jablow Hershman and Julian Lieb.

Ernest Hemingway
The Pulitzer Prize-winning novelist's suicidal depression is examined in the True Gen: An Intimate Portrait of Ernest Hemingway by Those Who Knew Him by Denis Brian.

Sylvia Plath
The poet and novelist ended her lifelong struggle with clinical depresion by taking own life, as reported in A Closer Look at Ariel: A Memory of Sylvia Plath by nancy Hunter-Steiner.

Michelangelo
The mental illness of one of the world's greatest artistic geniuses is discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr.

Winston Churchill
"Had he been a stable and equable man, he could never have inspired the nation. In 1940, when all the odds were against Britain, a leader of sober judgment might well have concluded that we were finished," wrote Anthony Storr about Churchill's bipolar disorder in Churchill's Black Dog, Kafka's Mice, and Other Phenomena of the Human Mind.

Vivien Leigh
The Gone with the Wind star suffered from mental illness, as documented in Vivien Leigh: A Biography by Ann Edwards.

Jimmy Piersall
The baseball player for the Boston Red Sox who suffered from bipolar disorder detailed his experience in The Truth Hurts.

Patty Duke
The Academy Award-winning actress told of her bipolar disorder in her autobiography and made-for-TV move Call Me Anna and A Brilliant Madness: Living with Manic-Depressive Illness, co-authored by Gloria Hochman.

Charles Dickens
One of the greatest authors in the English language suffered from clinical depression, as documented in The Key to Genius: Manic Depression and the Creative Life by D. Jablow Hershman and Julian Lieb, and Charles Dickens: His Tragedy and Triumph by Edgar Johnson.

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Wednesday, January 16, 2008

3:00 PM

From 42 to 36 (Jeans)

I have finally been able to zip up a pair of levi's but will hold off until they are comfortable, I'm setting my birthday one month away as my next short term goal.  I won a great deal from the personal trainer lessons I won at the gym.  Mixing up my cardio with spin classes, who new I'd be a natural, I actually use the spin studio when there aren't classes.  Cold here and riding outdoors is something I can't grasp. 

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Sunday, December 30, 2007

7:01 AM

Garth House

Author: Garth House There are so many things that mental illness steal from us: our friends, families, and lovers; our skills, talents, and interests; the simple passion for living; and sometimes the spirit of life and beauty itself. Then we are left an empty shell, spiritually, and emotionally dead yet caught in the devastating irony of still being among the living, with time truly "out of joint." Many, many of us have known this terrible reality: how it "creeps in this petty pace from day to day until the syllable of recorded time." (Shakespeare, Macbeth). In such a world, there is no weather. Nothing ever changes, nor is there any hope of anything ever changing. At times this is how it seems when we are caught in it. It is a world of gray, bleak twilight, and the ones who love us, no matter how compassionate they are and how much they care, simply cannot grasp or begin to taste the depth of our despair.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thank You so much for personal stories, each time I read them or hear other stories like a met at a party this Summer of a Gay man who's partner is also BiPolar at first he didn't disclose that, being HIV POS yes as that you can transmit, when he finally did discuss it, wow did it help the partner understand so much, they are also happily together.

Me, well, I'm struggling. I'm in RECOVERY and have such a hard time relating to people. I'm blessed to have a loving supportive father whom I share a home, he worries and often tells me he'd like to see me settled down with someone (and he means a Gay man) it's great. I try, I put myself out there every day, I organize so many functions as I'm involved in Gay Sports (Bowling) but when the parties are over, I often just clean up, keep busy and fade away until when away from it all, shed a tear or two, then quickly suck it back and go into meditation to calm myself down, get to a happy place....this is how I deal with my mood swings and it isn't easy for me.

Being Positive I know I've shaved some years off my life, being Bi Polar I also shaved some years off, I'm soon to be 49 and sounds like I may live to be 60, hopefully longer and where so many others are, until then I keep plugging away, writing, sharing, RIDING in the wonderful event AIDS LIFE CYCLE.

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Tuesday, December 4, 2007

8:02 AM

COPING WITH LIFE by Tom Davis

http://www.coping-with-life.com/search?q=puibello

**cut and paste into browser if this doesn't come up as a link.

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